1. Admit your poor choice 2. Do not blame others 3. Say you are sorry…
Oh, how I hate those words. I hate everything those words stand for. By definition, a generational curse is basically a defilement that was passed down from one generation to another.
There are many generational curses that can plague a family.
- irrational fears
According to Great Bible Study, a generational curse is “beyond learned behavior; many children learn to be messy if their parents are messy. This is a spiritual bondage that is passed down from one generation to another. Some symptoms of a generational curse is a continual negative pattern of something being handed down from generation to generation. ”
One thing I did not know was that adoption is not immune to these patterns being handed down. These kids who were chosen not only have the generational curses of their biological family but they also can inherit those tendencies of the adoptive family. No pressure there, right?
Generational curses can be “anything that seems to be a persistent struggle or problem that was handed down from one generation to another may very well be a generational curse.”
My family has lived with financial issues, depression, mental issues, alcoholism, addiction, enabling (is that a generational curse?), yelling, lying, pornography…..these are things that I pray that will be completely broken in my children. I don’t only pray for them to be broken, I pray that whenever the flesh is weak and these sin patterns become strong, that IF they act on it that my kids will immediately get sick to their stomachs and vomit! Extreme? Maybe in some peoples eyes, but not in mine. I want such a violent negative reaction to a generational curse that it is a constant reminder that “if I take a sip of that drink, I know that I’m going to be barfing up my toenails…so, I think I will pass.” Do I think drinking is wrong? No. I don’t. Some people can handle it and be okay…my family cannot handle it. Not even a little bit. So for our family, we teach our kids one sip is too much but do not judge those that can handle it because alcoholism may not be another person’s generational sin. Does that make sense?
I have seen SO much. I have felt SO much. I have hurt SO much. I have seen people I love DESTROY themselves….I don’t want my kids to have a part in that. I am blessed that my husband’s family does not have that particular problem (alcoholism) so my kids didn’t get a double whammy.
When we are in Christ and Christ is in us, through the grace and love of salvation…..do we still want to sin? Do we still have that tendency? Does that demon still swirl in us? We are still flesh. We are still fallible. Sin is gloriously beautiful and enticing. It is attractive and it is masked as everything we think we want. When we have Jesus in us, there is no room for a demon. We are made new, but we will still screw up. The difference is that when we screw up, that we begin to feel remorse and guilt for doing something that is so against what we know to be true. As a believer, you no longer have to ask forgiveness from our Father (you need to ask for forgiveness if you have chosen to hurt someone) because He has already forgiven you. The moment you ask Jesus into your heart….He comes to live in you. He casts all your sins as far as the east is from the west. He remembers them no more. However, He does not shield you from the consequences of your choice. He either disciplines us or natural consequences or both.
My heart has been broken over the choices of others within my family. I want to believe that things will change, that old wounds will heal, that forgiveness will take place but I’m in a place right now where I don’t want to forgive and I’m angry. I’m angry because I don’t want to see this generational sin take hold of the people I love. I don’t want to be angry, I want to be able to trust, I want to forget….I’m tired of crying. Here I sit…still hurt beyond reason, angry, choosing not to forgiven, trying to hide my tears…I choose to hold on to my pain while I watch the pain unfold in the people I love so dearly because of their shame.
There is a song that I crumble every single time I hear it. I crumble Every. Single. Time. because it reminds me of His faithfulness. His purpose. His ways are higher than my ways. He has got this. Beauty WILL come from ashes. Our shame is undone because we have the privilege of knowing Jesus Christ as our personal Savior.
My prayer is that He is strong because I am weak. I pray that I learn how to forgive…not forget….but forgive. I want to learn how to trust again. I want to have appropriate reactions to when we do fall into our flesh. I’m not immune because I have my own set of generational curses that I’m painfully aware of. I pray that my children and my children’s children will never be touched by the horror of addiction……………because it is just that, it is a horror. May I always remember that MY shame is undone. My HUSBAND’S shame is undone. My CHILDREN’S shame is undone. His presence in our lives is why we continue to run our race. I pray that I stop looking back and can keep my eyes on the Prize. Keeping running. Just keeping running.