I like her.
Time is Slipping Away
I find that the end of the day has rolled around and I have nothing to show for it 🙁
That is the thought that swirls and twirls through my mind. In reality, I know that that isn’t true, but I look around my house and think “how can it *still* smell like pee?
Yes…I said that.
I’m looking at my brand spanking new carpet cleaner, right now. It is perched in the corner of my living room. It is so sparkly and shiny that I don’t want to dull that shine with the muck of filthy carpets and dog hair.
Plus…I am sort of famous for catching 8 vacuum cleaners on fire…within 6 months of each other. Don’t ask cause I just don’t know. I think they all get together and decide they can’t handle the 6 kids, Big Daddy and all these dogs….so they just sacrifice their little lives and self combust in a last ditch effort to being used too much.
I feel like that, somedays….that I just need to self combust and call it a day.
Sorry, squirrel moment.
Reality is is that child one is rarely home. She flits in and out of this house like a bandit, in the night. When she is home, she talks so fast (to catch me up on life) that I only catch every third word. I find myself, more times than not, just nodding and smiling. I have no idea what I’m nodding and smiling too..but it is my effort to try and listen.
Child two is 17 and is finding her way. She is busy right now with finishing schoolwork, babysitting 4 days a week, volunteering one day a week and she just got hired, part-time and that training will be starting this week, as well.
Child three does well to just manage her behaviors and her choices. I’m proud to say that she is caught up and doing well in her schoolwork and she has been on an upswing, lately..which for a child that struggles with RAD, this is a good good GOOD thing. There are still moments and those moments suck the life right out of all of us…but we are learning (after 8 years) to manage, admit poor choices, don’t blame others, apologize, and move on.
Child four has baseball two to three times a night. In one town, while child six has baseball two to three times a week in a separate town. I can’t even begin to describe the logic behind that decision because it is too complicated.
Child five has just completed his Special Olympics track event (he won first in the 100m dash and 2nd in the softball throw). That practice was weekly and the Regionals was an all day event. He has qualified for state, but probably won’t be attending because it is a three day event in June and I don’t want him to go unattended. He will be starting karate, soon…so there is another couple of nights out of the week.
So, between therapy, doctors appointments, hearing aid appointments, cooking, schooling, cleaning…I know that I have not been idle. It is just this house. This morning, I was looking at the MOUNDS of paperwork yet to be filed because…well…I just haven’t had time (or the desire), so I’ve been piling it up for far too long. I was determined, today, to tackle that project.
As you can see, because I’m blogging, I didn’t get too far. I do have it sorted and maybe sort of (completely) strung from one side of my bedroom to the next. It is organized chaos. I will get it done. I know I will. Eventually, I will get it done.
For now, I sit here…blogging…looking at my sparkly carpet cleaner smiling at me. I have about 4 unfinished projects because I can’t focus long enough to get one completed. I have our vacation looming over us and I’m no where near prepared for that undertaking (first massive vacation taken as a family of 8…for 10 days…God help me). Speech wraps up for kid five, this week…we have a couple of weeks off and then it will a two week trek to therapy where I will sit for 2 hours while he works. Go ahead, covet…I know you want too.
My dog smells like fish. My carpet smells like urine. My toenails need to be painted. My bedroom has been overtaken by paperwork. Lola ate my recipes (literally), and I have snot. Lots and lots of snot.
I’ll get something finished today. I will. I will. I know I will.